To begin, I’ll preface this with, “This is not a pity party!” I figure if I write this out, I’ll be more accountable for my goals and hopefully some of you can relate!
Back when I was working, I dreamed of the day where I could be a stay-at-home mom. I would be supermom. I would have a spotless house, a happy, stimulated, well-developed child that I would read to every day, I would document every teeny milestone, and have home-cooked meals on the table for dinner every night. Let’s not forget the Pinterest-worthy cupcakes I would bake. I would blog all the time, keep up with Pinterest, facebook, Twitter, and now Instagram, because I would be home all day long, and I would have time for these things. I would have perfectly manicured nails, and best of all, I would be thin because I’d take the baby on walks every day and have time to frequently use my dusty old exercise DVDs.
I think I spent more time doing all those things when I was actually working.
I really don’t know where the days go, but something needs to change! Ben is now almost 5 months old and I am hardly living up to my expectations. My excuses? Weak at best. Ben has never had a consistent nap schedule, so I’ve never been able to, say, make a lasagna during his afternoon nap, because that nap doesn’t exist every day! The fact that he’s been quiet enough for 20 minutes for me to write this is a miracle in itself. Lately, he’s been getting bored and whiny and I need to change his activity about every 15 minutes. Can’t get much done in 15 minutes. And I also hate interruptions. If I can’t finish something in one “go,” I won’t even try. This clearly does not work with a baby. Honestly, if I want to cook a nice meal, I need to start at 2:00 in order to have it ready by 6, with all the interruptions.
Anyway, not good excuses! I always said that if I’m at home, that will be my job. And frankly, if this were my real job, I would have been fired a long time ago!
I am more like this:
Except Lynette (above, Desperate Housewives, people!) is actually wearing a shirt in the above photo, with laundry in the background, implying she does laundry (to be fair, I do laundry, but it usually sits in the dryer or in the laundry basket for at least a week before I put it away). When I get “dressed” in the morning, that usually consists of putting on
mom jeans yoga pants (or their comfy cousin, leggings, if I’m feeling fancy) and a fresh nursing tank (fresh nursing tank optional, dirty overnight nursing tank likely).
I remember learning about “cognitive dissonance” in my psychology classes in college. Where a person has strongly held beliefs but acts in a way opposite to those beliefs. Like someone who knows how bad smoking is for health, but smokes anyway. It causes all kind of anxiety and other nonsense and it’s just not a healthy state of mind!
So, I’m going to make some baby steps for change. Starting with a chore chart (inspired by Molly @Stilettos & Diapers), today!
Anyone have tips for “doing it all”?