Weekend Update – Week 3

Yikes – has another week gone by already?!  Time for this week’s weekend update with Dana, Sami & Leann! (Why is it that I always want to say, “with Tina Fey & Jimmy Fallon?”)

On Friday, I went nuts making baby food (stay tuned for a new series, Benjamin Eats, coming this week!) – with bananas, carrots, and pears on the menu.

Saturday was spent almost entirely at the mall.  Derek was working, so I took Ben for my first post-baby-bathing-suit-shopping-excursion.  What. A. Nightmare.  And for reasons different than what you would expect.  It was a bodily fluids bonanza.

As if shopping for a bathing suit after having a baby isn’t bad enough, Ben started fussing in the fitting room.  Odd, because he’s normally a great shopping buddy (he gets a lot of practice).   So, I took him out of the stroller and there it was…  trouble…  an ass-splosion.     A  sh**tastrophe.

Sick.  I couldn’t put him back in the stroller with poo everywhere while I set up an impromptu diaper-changing-station, so I had to let him crawl around the dirty fitting room floor.  SICK.  Once we took care of his diaper/clothing change issue, he was still fussing.  I was still trying on bathing suits.  And I think we all remember (if not, read HERE) what happens when Ben starts fussing in a fitting room. 

A lact-cident. (I’m killin’ it with the new words today, huh? Can’t take credit for ass-plosion or sh**tastrophe, but lact-cident? TOTALLY JUST INVENTED. Booyah.)

Despite the day’s challenges, I managed to find a $110 bathing suit that I got for… drumroll please… $10!  Between the sale at Macy’s, and some old gift cards, I only spent $10 big ones.  Suck it, budget!

Good lord, what a day.  And if that wasn’t enough, my fave D&G sunnies broke beyond repair while we were shopping.  Say it with me now – WAAAAAH!

I’m sad because I loved them, sad because they were expensive, but mostly sad because they have sentimental value.  Derek bought them for me on our way to our honeymoon (since he accidentally drove over my Coach sunglasses, crushing them, the night of our rehearsal dinner). 

Le sigh.

And after all that fun, we needed to pick up a few things at the Wal-Mart, and I won’t even get into the grimy details, but it involved a screaming newborn with two completely dickhead parents that just ignored the poor thing the ENTIRE TIME.  I actually still can’t comprehend how the mom was so completely unaffected while I was practically crumbling to the ground.  I almost went up to them to ask if they wanted me to rock and shush the baby for them because my heart was breaking for that baby oh so bad.  It obviously needed something – food, cuddles – something. 

I may or may not have cried on the way home, hand to my chest, and totally burst into ugly face tears when I walked in the door and Derek asked how shopping was.  Yes, he thought I was crazy for being that upset about a stranger’s baby, but I’m sure some of you mamas understand!

On Sunday, we started the day with a new food for Ben – PEARS!  I’ll save his reaction for a later post in the new Benjamin Eats series.  But oh, were we surprised!

Since Ben is now SUPERCRAWLER extraordinaire (a.k.a., fast as heck), we spent some time on Sunday babyproofing.  And subsequently getting annoyed every time we had to pop off an outlet cover to plug something in.  As well as trying to figure out where to get 1 stove knob cover because they are sold in packs of 5.  We have 6 knobs.  Isn’t THAT ironic, Alanis?

Later on, Derek’s mom and grandmother stopped by for a visit, which was fun.  And even better was my MIL calling later in the evening to give me complete warm fuzzies by telling me how much she admires our parenting and what we do for Ben, and how much she loves us all.  My heart was about to explode in the best possible way.  Who doesn’t love compliments on their parenting, especially since it’s probably the most sensitive topic that people worry about (“Am I doing this right?” “Am I a good mom?”).

We ended the day enjoying a little time in the front yard where Derek showed off his newest model remote control airplane creation, and Ben tried to smash the wings. Typical.

And that, my friends, is all.  Let’s see if I can make good on my promise to myself to go to bed early tonight, and for the rest of the week so I’m not an evil tired witch for vacation next week.  Except RHONJ is calling my name already…

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